My First "Not Me!" Monday Post

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Here is what I most certainly have NOT been doing this week...

I did not attempt to take my two young boys to $0.31 scoop night at Baskin Robbins, by myself, knowing there would be a long line, just because I love Baskin Robbins ice cream. Who would do that? Certainly not this mom.

I also did not try to hold my ice cream cone, my wallet and both of my kids who were in turn carrying their own ice cream cones while attempting to pay in a crowded ice cream shop with about 30 other people waiting. Again, definitely not me!

I most certainly did not forget to bring cash and then use my debit card to pay my $1.01 ice cream tab while others, who were paying with cash and had exact change, waited for me to check out. I mean that is just poor etiquette. This woman would never do something like that.

I then did not proceed to accidentally knock my child's ice cream scoop off his cone, onto the ground outside, then pick it up and act like I was going to throw it out in front of the other parents who were watching. Furthermore, I did not actually scrape off the top that landed on the ground and let him eat it once I was out of eye sight because I was not willing to wait in line for another 30 minutes for a new $0.31 ice cream cone. That is something I would never do!

I also did not, not learn from the incident in the previous paragraph and do the exact same thing with my other child's ice cream cone. Only a crazy person would do that twice, and I am not crazy not that crazy.

I certainly did not end up eating a green and blue pop rocks ice cream cone because my son preferred my chocolate, caramel ice cream cone, and then pretend like I didn't actually, secretly like the overly-sweet, stain-your-tongue, crunchy, candy ice cream flavor. That could not have been me, because this mom does not have sweet tooth, or at least one that is that strong!

Finally, this mom did not forget to bring along her portable potty knowing that she has a little boy who has only been officially potty training for about 2 weeks and will not use a public restroom and he did not say, "Mommy, I have to go potty," as I was buckling him into his car seat to go home. Consequently, this quick-thinking mommy did not try to get her little boy to pee, standing outside the van, in a busy strip-mall parking lot, with his pants around his ankles, while aiming at a dried berry she found on the ground, because that would be no pressure on a little boy at all. I would never do such a thing and I would certainly not bribe him the entire 15 minute ride home with anything I could think of to get him not to pee in the car seat, since he would pee outside in the public parking lot.

I know most of you know me very well, or at least well enough to know that I would never do any of the things mentioned above.